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Profiles from the Past
July 19, 2003 ~ 4:57 PM
I was digging through the drop down list on my AIM sign on screen. And I signed onto my old sn RavenRose24. This is my profile on that. I am deleting the name so it will be lost forever soon.
Long ago, a loved one thrusted a sharp dagger deep into my innocent heart, shattering my world of love. My heart pulls away as the painful incident brings fear. Stunned, my mind scrambled to make sense of the puncture my heart sustained. The pattern continues; trust becomes delusion. My heart reflects failure, loneliness, insecurity. The inner voice is a lie. My heart's small whispers begin to scream. Plunging into a darkness of despair, knowledge of failure permeates my body. Loathing is created; it will not relent. The heart slowly dies, unaware of its fate. Day after day, darkness kills thoughts before they transform into action bringing paralysis to life. Moving deeper into hopelessness, the childhood dream no longer exists. Replaced with a cold bitterness. Death is the only escape and love is a lie.
Here is my profile for KnkyLilKittyKat:
Hey, wanna know something about me? Just ask. IM me or e-mail me at [email protected]"Good girls are just bad girls but smarter. We don't get caught."
I'm a good kitty... but I might scratch.
I really liked this screen name a lot. TiARa024 cuz I used to be called Princess cuz the older guys treated me like a little princess and called me that. It reminds me of fun times. I used to go around town with my Sharpie tagging TiARa024 everywhere. Lol.
Hey, %n! I'm Kaitlyn. I'm nice. IM me.--> Click here if you're a HOT guy! <--
The screen name sparklznsuch came about in my sparkly era. Lol. Sparklznsuch this. Sparklz24 that. Sparklz everything. It was during this era that my diary was born.
{um.. Kat is a dumbass because she forgot her password to sparklznsuch... =P Sorry, folks.
Ah. VEGG1EKat. Made when I moved away from home. Up to UCSC. Decided to leave my sparkly era behind, and express myself in my screen name. Vegetarian. Nick-named Kat. Kaitlyn is rarely heard any longer. No longer was I known as Kaitlyn. Instead, the world knew me as Kat. That Asian girl who wears the cat ears. The screen name that belonged to that girl Noah Dekkers fell in love with. VEGG1EKat spent 80% of her IMs with NoahDekkers online. This is the screen name I had when Noah broke my heart.
Does anybody know where I am? Do you know about the pain? What about the anger? The lack of appreciation for beauty and the inability to love? The absence of passion for life? The wish to end this internal and eternal suffering? This emptiness in my chest can be filled by one thing, one particular thing only. That is my heart."If you love somone, set them free. If they return to you, put several 8 inch blades into their head. If they return again, then run... just run." -Dirge
Unfortunately I have already deleted Amethystar24 and OMFG Noah sucks. So this is not a full gallery of past profiles. Amethystar24 was my AOL screen name from the olden days. My very first screen name ever. I loved it. I love amethyst still and of course, I still love stars. OMFG Noah sucks is the screen name the majority of you might know me by. The screen name created to make a joke of all that hurt inside. Each time talking online reminding me that Noah does suck. He took my heart. Pain that I no longer have to hide from. Therefore, I've made a new screen name. And those other screen names are simply a part the history of Kat.
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�MY 5 MOST RECENT ENTRIES�
August 02, 2004 [3:29 AM] - Took the HELL test again...
July 29, 2004 [3:57 AM] - Forgiveness... Meh. Lol
July 28, 2004 [4:54 PM] - Emotional Limbo... *bends over backwards*
July 28, 2004 [1:29 PM] - the miracle of Moo
July 28, 2004 [3:05 AM] - The sound of the ocean....