Last Entry - Next Entry - Newest Entry he emailed me April 15, 2003 ~ 12:15 AM As a "caring friend" of course. Iono. At least he still cares. He wants me to commit myself to a mental institution. I would... but I do need to get them As this quarter, you know? Maybe during the summer? I'm seriously thinking about it. Noah really wants me to. For him to actually email me. I mean, wow. He'll help pay for it, too. Cept if he got back together there wouldn't be any problems at all... Lol. {I actually copy/pasted the list to save. Not like I'd delete his email anytime soon but still... just to keep it handy?} I'm just so happy right now cuz I got my place to live and they AREN'T gonna send me to a mental institution. My life is wonderful right now except for the lack of that person who made it all possible. Even if the rain stops {I love the rain} there'll still be a rainbow for me after {I love rainbows, too}. I just need to find my rainbow again. I love him more each and everyday and it's horrible. Alex sed he saw Noah twice since we've broken up and I burst out crying I was so jealous. Lol. I guess I do get jealous now. The emptiness is still there, so is the sick feeling in the stomach, but you know what? Just getting an email from him... there's a little spark of that old joy and happiness that compelled me to dance around and giggle and run p-orbitals. Gotta get back to my mommy.. I am neglecting her... lol. she's waiting patiently on the phone I told her I was checking something online. Oops. Lies came easily with my parents. Cuz I didn't really love them... and now I feel bad even with that little white lie and I find myself racing to get done. Lol. Did I tell you that today when I tried to sign the release form I forgot how to spell my last name? That's how lost I am right now. Lol. Of all the 25 other letters in the alphabet I could not think of a single one to go after "H". At the time it made me cry even more, same when I told my friends. But now I sorta think it's really funny. I'm such a dork. Last Entry - Next Entry - Newest Entry ~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~ �MY 5 MOST RECENT ENTRIES� August 02, 2004 [3:29 AM] - Took the HELL test again... July 29, 2004 [3:57 AM] - Forgiveness... Meh. Lol July 28, 2004 [4:54 PM] - Emotional Limbo... *bends over backwards* July 28, 2004 [1:29 PM] - the miracle of Moo July 28, 2004 [3:05 AM] - The sound of the ocean.... .