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June 13, 2003 ~ 5:28 PM
I gues syou can say that I sorta bonded with Andy last night... I think me and him could really become friends if he'd just let me in... I like him. He's a really good person. I think he just needs to get used to me... I'm a bit too.... wild for him I guess. So I went and got drunk off my ass then high as a kite last night... And I've been randomly crying over Noah... like in the shower and on the bus, etc. Weird, huh. I miss that kid so much... I miss my heart. Pain has become such a familiar feeling that it's almost dulled; only flaring up on certain occasions... fucking me up. ::yawn:: I am so in love with this All-American Rejects CD. =] Auriel burned it for me. Me and him decided not to have sex anymore. Strictly platonic relatioship... I was prolly unhealthy for him anyway... And then there's me... Filling my life with meaningless sex to try and forget Noah. I'll never forget Noah. I mean, sometimes when I'm really high or really drunk I don't think about him. But those are only two minute lapses at most... Or it could be 2 seconds and just seem longer. Meh. So yeah... Pulled an all nighter, took an hour nap, then laid awake listening to Auriel breathe/snore softly. I tried making him wake up... he wasn't cooperating too much... Meh. I did the photo shoot today. It was SO FUN. I love modeling. I want to get really serious with it... But I'm also gonna be filling out job applications on the side. Cuz I do need a real job. The people at the child care center are slacking. They say that I don't need to fill out another application but they still haven't told me yes or no yet. GR THEM! I think I'm gonna look for other day care centers in Santa Cruz that might hire me. Meh. Going to LA tonight and such. Woohoo. Gonna do a shoot or two down there I think. Mhmm. Yeah... I met a really nice grad student today. He's like 29 and he catches snakes! w00t. Lol. I started talking to him at the bus stop and he offered me lunch. {And Andy sez that grad students aren't cool. Grad students rock. Lol.} So I got nachos at the Saturn Cafe {Or Hepetitis Cafe as Andy calls it} and a milkshake. Woohoo! And he's gonna show me his snakes when I get back from LA. *yay* His name is Mitch and I very much enjoy talking to him... It was a good conversation... I'll prolly hang out with him sometime and talk about snakes with him again! Hehe. Imma go pack, now. Toodles!
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�MY 5 MOST RECENT ENTRIES�
August 02, 2004 [3:29 AM] - Took the HELL test again...
July 29, 2004 [3:57 AM] - Forgiveness... Meh. Lol
July 28, 2004 [4:54 PM] - Emotional Limbo... *bends over backwards*
July 28, 2004 [1:29 PM] - the miracle of Moo
July 28, 2004 [3:05 AM] - The sound of the ocean....