Last Entry - Next Entry - Newest Entry
I love this guy Charlie and I still love Abel... (DAMMIT!)
September 02, 2002 ~ 11:16 PM
Bhmn care o ac: yo
RavenRose24: hey sexy
Bhmn care o ac: yo
RavenRose24: welcome
RavenRose24: why are u yellow
RavenRose24: i dont like that color
RavenRose24: ;-P
Bhmn care o ac: cause yellow stands out
Bhmn care o ac: is that better
RavenRose24: hmmm
RavenRose24: why cant u just do a nice color like blue?
Bhmn care o ac: ok
RavenRose24: or light blue?
RavenRose24: yeah
RavenRose24: that works
Bhmn care o ac: red
RavenRose24: wut u have
RavenRose24: lol
RavenRose24: do u know if mark appleyard has aim?
RavenRose24: or aol?
Bhmn care o ac: i don't know
RavenRose24: what do u think guys like most about me?
Bhmn care o ac: tht you are a horny asian girl
RavenRose24: lol
RavenRose24: really?
RavenRose24: wuts my best asset?
Bhmn care o ac: maybe
Bhmn care o ac: at least that's why i like you
RavenRose24: hahahah
Bhmn care o ac: your best asset is that you can put up with me
RavenRose24: lol
RavenRose24: ur not hard to put up with, love
RavenRose24: i'm serious
RavenRose24: what do u think my best aspect is?
Bhmn care o ac: thats good i suppose
RavenRose24: wuts my best asset?
Bhmn care o ac: um
Bhmn care o ac: on a first impression, or after someone has already goten to know you?
RavenRose24: hmm
RavenRose24: tell me both
Bhmn care o ac: first impression: your curves and you are outgiong
Bhmn care o ac: afterwards: persuant and your curves
RavenRose24: lol
RavenRose24: anyhow my curves
Bhmn care o ac: ?
RavenRose24: im just wondering
RavenRose24: why it is that guys find me attractive?
Bhmn care o ac: cause your a sexy beast
RavenRose24: hahahahhaha
RavenRose24: thanks
RavenRose24: lol
Bhmn care o ac: cause you are
RavenRose24: ur so adorable
RavenRose24: thanks
I really do love my friend Charlie. He's the greatest. He makes me feel better about myself and stuff. He has such low self esteem though and I worry about him. But he's great. One of the most honest, open, adorable guys you will ever meet in your life. He's beautiful. One of my bestest friends in the world. I feel so comfortable with him. I spent a lot of today with him. It was cool. We just watched skate videos and cuddled. He's trying to teach me a bit of skater lingo. Like the tricks and stuff. Yeah right. No. He's a sweetie though. So cute.
I called Abel today... I actually got to talk to him for about five minutes. But his neighbor was over. Pretty little Mexican girl named Nicole. I wonder what they do. I feel this heavy pain settle on my heart when I think of him. I cried after he hung up with me. He'd told me to call him at 10. I did. He wasn't home. That's the thing with falling so in love with someone, you give them the power to hurt you, to tear you up inside. And no one knows how much I am hurting. Not Charlie, not Steve, not Ricky, not Alex, not Daniel. I keep the pain inside of me. I don't wanna bug my friends with it. Do they know I cry almost everyday? That Abel Luque is still the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last thing on my mind when I drift off the sleep? I sleep clutching his bandanna in my hand. I'll wake up if it slips out of my grasp and I find it again. He's 15 minutes away from me yet so so far. But he's still in my heart. I still love him. He doesn't deserve me, my love and devotion and passion. He doesn't; so why do I still love him so much?
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~
�MY 5 MOST RECENT ENTRIES�
August 02, 2004 [3:29 AM] - Took the HELL test again...
July 29, 2004 [3:57 AM] - Forgiveness... Meh. Lol
July 28, 2004 [4:54 PM] - Emotional Limbo... *bends over backwards*
July 28, 2004 [1:29 PM] - the miracle of Moo
July 28, 2004 [3:05 AM] - The sound of the ocean....