Last Entry - Next Entry - Newest Entry Feelin a lil better... May 21, 2004 ~ 12:24 AM Okay so maybe it's a lot. I just talked to Matt again and he was more open to conversation. It was really awesome and I believe that he won't break his promises. *yay* He doesn't think he will. And he wants me to move up in June again. He'd said he didn't wanna see me til July originally... But that's not the way to solve this problem. I need to be there with him to help him ease the pain. If I had let him alone he woulda juss gotten a lot drunk and high and dwelled on the pain. It woulda been extremely detrimental to our relationship. But we are going through as planned now. And I get to be with my baby again. Imma move up there June 16th or 17th and then we're moving to Watsonville. He's still gonna love me forever and not hurt me and not go to Costa Rica... And I'm still gonna keep all my promises. No more irrational depression-caused freak outs and no more suicidal threats no matter how much I am feeling it. Kitty is gonna fight her fuckin demons... And Matt is gonna fight his defense mechanisms [blocking me out, not loving me, etc]. This is gonna work dammit. He loves me so much and I can hear it in his voice again. I am positive that this will be wonderful. And that he won't break his promise. We're gonna be happy. You'll see. I dunno if anyone notices but my password is now "2545238837" which is "a lil better" if u type it in a cell phone. That's how I come up with any of my passwords. Now u know my secret! Teehee. Juss thought I'd share that. =) I love Matt so much. Last Entry - Next Entry - Newest Entry ~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~ �MY 5 MOST RECENT ENTRIES� August 02, 2004 [3:29 AM] - Took the HELL test again... July 29, 2004 [3:57 AM] - Forgiveness... Meh. Lol July 28, 2004 [4:54 PM] - Emotional Limbo... *bends over backwards* July 28, 2004 [1:29 PM] - the miracle of Moo July 28, 2004 [3:05 AM] - The sound of the ocean.... .