Last Entry - Next Entry - Newest Entry my body got really cold all of a sudden August 19, 2003 ~ 4:56 AM First Auriel tells me that hooking up with me was a mistake that he'll never repeat again. {He sorta saved himself by saying that I was a good mistake}. Then he tells me the only reason why he had sex with me was cuz he was too tired to fight me off. That the last girl he was going after "broke" him. Ouch. Fragile Kat... I think that's the second time he's made me cry. I wonder how long it will be til Matt makes me cry. Auriel is the victim here. I don't even know how to begin to apologize to my darling Auriel. I mean, I took his virginity. Against his will. He didn't want it. He didn't want to have sex with me. I feel like such fucking shit. Regret losing your virginity to me, Auriel? No. Now the truth comes out. When he no longer wants to date me. God I hate myself so fucking much. And there I was loving him, not knowing that I was hurting him. I still remember the night I lost my virginity. I will never ever stop regretting that night. I hate myself so much for making Auriel's first a night to regret instead of a night to remember. I think I'm gonna throw up. Last Entry - Next Entry - Newest Entry ~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~ �MY 5 MOST RECENT ENTRIES� August 02, 2004 [3:29 AM] - Took the HELL test again... July 29, 2004 [3:57 AM] - Forgiveness... Meh. Lol July 28, 2004 [4:54 PM] - Emotional Limbo... *bends over backwards* July 28, 2004 [1:29 PM] - the miracle of Moo July 28, 2004 [3:05 AM] - The sound of the ocean.... .